Cuirt an Mheán Oíche—The Midnight Court le/by Brian Merriman

Cuid a Cúig: An Breithiúnas is an Réiteach Tugann Aoibheal a breithiúnas ar na fadhbanna a bhí pléite sa chúirt. Tairngríonn sí go mbeidh cead ag na sagairt pósadh go luath agus ceadaíonn sí géarleanúint ar fhir nach bhfuil sásta pósadh. Sé an file an chéad duine a thoghtar le sciúirseáil a dhéanamh air.

Part Five: The Judgment and Resolution Aoibheal issues her judgment on the issues brought before the court. She foretells that priests soon will be allowed to marry and she gives permission for the persecution of recalcitrant bachelors. The poet finds to his horror that he is the first to face the music.

D’éirigh an mhánla ar bharr a bínse,	855	The day was dawning out in the street,
’S do shoillsi’ an lá san áit ’n-a timcheall,	856	As Aoibheal rose up from her seat
B’áluinn óg a cló ’s a caoindreach,	857	She had a youthful glow on her form and face
B’árd a glór ba bheó is ba bhíodhgach.	858	Her voice was strong and full of grace
D’fháisc a dóirne is d’orduigh deimhneach	859	She clasped her hands and with vehemence
Báille ar bórd ag fógairt Silence.	860	Instructed the bailiff to order Silence
Adubhairt a béal bhí ag séideadh soillse,—	861	The whole of the court gradually grew quiet
An chúirt go léir go faon ag éisteacht:—	862	And she spoke these words in a voice so bright—
Do-gheibhimse díreach brígh chun buaidhte	863	I find lot’s of merit in the case you bring
’S feidhm it chaínt-se a bhrídeach bhuartha.	864	It was a hell of a speech, you poor young thing.
Chím, ’s is dóigh gur dóighte an radharc liom,	865	I see, and it’s a sight that’s certainly grave,
Síolrach Órfhlaith Mhóire is Mheidhbhe,	866	That the descendants of Orla, Mór and Meave
An seifteóir caol ’s an créatúir cladhartha,	867	Are now sly connivers and spineless creatures
An ceisteóir claon ’s an déirceóir doigheartha,	868	Creepy characters and poor alms-seekers
Súgh na táire is tál na coimse	869	The lowliest of the low and the fairly well off
Ag súil le sárfhuil sámh na saoithe.	870	Desperately coveting the bloodlines of the toff.
Achtáimid mar dlighe do bhéithe	871	These are the laws that will govern from this date:
An seacht fó thrí gan choimhreach céile	872	One: He who reaches twenty-one without a mate
Do tharraing ar cheann go teann gan truaighe	873	Shall be dragged off by the hair of his head
’S a cheangal don chrann so i dteannta an tuama.	874	And tied to a tree there among the dead
Bainigidhe lom de a chobhail ’s a chóta,	875	His coat to be taken and he be made to strip
’S feannaigidhe a dhrom ’s a chom le córda.	876	And the daylights beaten out of him with a whip.
An chuid aca tharla báidhte i mbliadhnta	877	Two: Those of the men who are old and sick
’S cheileas go táir an táirnge tiarpa,	878	Who shamelessly failed to use their prick
Chuireas amugha gan subhchus d’éinne	879	And wasted the best years of their youth
Buile na hútha is lúth a ngéaga,	880	Without giving pleasure however minute
Do mheilleas a gcáil is fagháil ar mhnaoi aca	881	With women willing, they could have had a spree
Ag feitheamh gan fáth ar bharr na craoibhe,	882	But hung round like Mad Sweeney in the tree
Fágaim fúibh-se tionnscal páise	883	The design of their torture to you I entrust,
A mhná na dúile dúbhadh le dálgus;	884	You women of dashed and disappointed lust;
Ceapaigidhe fírnimh teinte is tairngibh,	885	Use female ingenuity to plan the details
Caithigidhe smaointe is inntleacht mhná leis,	886	Of a hell of fire and a rack of nails
Cuiridh bhur gcomhairle i gcomhar le chéile,	887	Put your heads together and stay the course
’S tugaimse comhachta an fórsa dhéanamh.	888	I’ill give you the power to put it in force
Do-bheirim gan spás díbh páis na gciantach,—	889	You are free to punish the old men at will
’S beag liom bás gan barrghoin pian dóibh.	890	In their case, I don’t care if you torture or kill.
Ní chuirimse i bhfáth de bharr mo chaínte	891	In my commission to you, I don’t mind
An foirbhtheach fálta cáslag claoidhte,	892	How you treat the oldsters, blighted and blind
An gabhal gan gotha ná an gola gan geall shuilt,	893	With their bony bodies and grimacing grins
An toll gan toradh ná an tormach fallsa,	894	Their lifeless lions and scabrous skins.
Acht léigthar an óige i gcóir chum síolraidh	895	Three: If the young go about the job of copulation
’S déanfa an sórt so clóca is díon dóibh.	896	Then my law will protect them from condemnation.
’S minic a do-chímse rinnsigh bhaotha	897	I’m grateful when I see working men, sometimes poor
Ag tuitim le tigheas, is bímse buidheach díobh,	898	Labouring so hard you’d think they’d faint for sure
Gabhtha le mná de lá agus d’oidhche	899	Affectionate with their wives by day and by night
Ag cosnamh a gcáil ’s ar scáith a ngníomhartha;	900	Protecting their good name with all their might
Ag seasamh ’n-a bhfeidhil is bhfeidhm go fálta,	901	Standing by their side because it is right
A n-ainm ar chlann is bheinnse sásta.	902	To see these guys with kids would be such a delight
Do chuala siolla is do cuireadh i bhásta é—	903	Four: I heard a rumour that I’ve kept under wraps—
Is fuath liom boineannach iomadach ráidhteach—	904	I can’t stand women who can’t close their traps—
Labhair go réidh is glaeidh go híseal,	905	Don’t be too loud in spreading it around
Bos ar do bhéal, is baoghal bheith caínteach!	906	Button the lip, safer to stay underground!
Seachain go fóill na comhachtaigh íogmhair	907	Don’t push it too hard with the bishops yet
’S caithfe siad pósadh fós pé chífeas.	908	That they’ll soon be married is a pretty safe bet.
Tiocfaidh an lá le lánchéad comhairle	909	The day will come if you’re quiet diplomats
’S cuirfidh an Pápa lámh na gcomhacht air,	910	When the Pope will issue the necessary diktats
Suidhfe an chuideachta ar thubaist na tíre,	911	A commission will examine the country’s state
Is scaoilfar chugaibh faoi urchall coimhrigh	912	And there’ll be released to you, free to mate,
Fiadhntus fola agus fothram na feóla	913	Priests with fire in their blood and pulsing flesh
Is mian bhur dtoile na stollairí teó so.	914	And the pick of these heart-throbs will fall into your mesh.
Éanduine eile dar hoileadh ó mhnaoi ar bith—	915	Five: Anyone else who is of woman born
Léighidh a ndeirim is feicim do bhíodhga;	916	Read him the riot act if he doesn’t reform
Ar shlighe mo chumuis ná fulaing i gcaoi ar bith	917	Don’t have anything to do with sons of bitches
Sraoill gan urraim ná Muirinn i mbríste,	918	Slovens without honour or Muireanns in britches
Acht leanaid san tóir na feoidhtigh liatha	919	And Six: Keep on the track of the old greybeards
Is glanaigidhe Fódla ón sórt seo fiadhaile!	920	And be sure to clear Ireland of all such weeds.
Caithfe me gluaiseacht uaibh chun siubhail,	921	That’s it, I must get going, I’ve appointments to keep,
Is fada mo chuairt-se ar fhuaid na Mumhan;	922	Many a mile to go before I sleep
An turus tá rómham ní fhoghnann moill do,	923	The journey before me won’t brook delay
Is iomad den ghnó anso fós gan éisteacht.	924	Unfinished business here will wait a new day
Casfa me arís ’s is fíor nách fáilteach	925	I’ll be back, which to some is not good news
D’fhearaibh nach díon me thigheacht don áit seo;	926	Those to whom I give the blues;
An chuid aca atá go táir n-a smaointe,	927	Who burnish their reputations when they spread
Fuireann nach fuláir leó a gcáil bheith sínte,	928	Stories about girls they’ve had in bed
Mhaoidheas le fothram a gcothrom ar bhéithe,	929	Who noisily boast having their way with maids
Chífe an pobul a gcogair ’s a sméide.	930	So the public will judge them dashing blades
’S taitneamhach leó ’s is dóth gur laochus	931	It gives these poltroons such a rush to the head
Scannal na hóige pósta is aonta,	932	To scandalize the young, both single and wed
Mian a dtoile ní sporann a gcionta,	933	Their motives are not out of concupiscence
Bréantus fola ná borradh na drúise,	934	The desires of the flesh or crazed tumescence
Taitneamh don ghníomh ná fíoch na féithe	935	The pleasure of the act or fire in the veins
Acht magadh na mílte, maooidheamh a n-éachta.	936	But the notoriety that their conduct attains.
Ní saínnt dá sógh bheir beó na céadta	937	It’s not pursuing enjoyment that excites their senses
Acht caínt is gleó agus mórtus laochuis,	938	But the general hullabaloo caused by their offences.
Mustar is ábhacht is ráig gan riaghail,	939	Of course, it’s all ostentation, exhibitionism and show
’S a gcumus go tláth gan tál gan triall,	940	With no more justification than that a chicken should crow
Go tuisealeach tárrlag támh ’n-a n-iall,	941	Stumbling, bumbling, impotent, cold
’S cuthach le gábha ar a mhná ’n a ndiaidh.	942	They couldn’t arouse a woman for silver or gold.
Glacfad me go réidh an méid seo láithreach,	943	I’d deal with these miscreants right now, right here
Caithfe me géilleadh ’o mhéid mo phráinneach,	944	But I’m out of time, have to pack my gear
Cuirfe me an bhuidhean so i gcuing ’s in ughaim	945	I’ll throw the lot of them in the hoosegow
Nuair thiocfa me arís san mí seo chughainn.	946	When I come back here a month from now.
Do breathain me cruinn an ríghbhean réilteach,	947	I had observed Aoibheal closely through the night
’S do laguigh mo chroidhe le linn bheith réidh dhi,	948	When she finished, I began to feel very uptight
D’airigh me dásacht ghránmhar éigin	949	I experienced a profound fit of agitation
Is pairithis bháis im chnámha ’s im chéadfadh;	950	My body paralyzed, my mind in consternation
Chonnairc me an tír ’s an tigheas ar luascadh,	951	I thought that the ground and the building were shaking
Is fuinneamh a caínte ag rinnce im chluasa.	952	And with the import of her words, I was also quaking.
Tagann an bíoma bíodhgach báille,	953	The giant bailiff woman strides across the hall
Is leathain mo líthe ar shíneadh a láimhe;	954	When she stuck out that paw, I thought I’d fall.
Tharraing ar chluais go stuacach stórtha	955	She angrily grabbed me by the lug
Stracaithe suas léi ar uachtar bóird me.	956	And to the front of the room, I was drug.
Preabann an bháb so chráidh an t-aonta,	957	There was the babe who was bummed at her fate
Greadann a lámha ’s is árd do léim sí.	958	She clapped her hands, and jumping up straight
Is aibidh adubhairt—A chrústa chríona	959	She fiercely said: You old bag of slime
Is fada me ag súil let chúlsa chíoradh,	960	I’ve had my eye on you for a very long time
Is minic do sluigheamh thu, a chroidhe gan daonnacht,	961	It’s often I urged you, you heartless carrion
Is mithid duit stríocadh ’o dhlí na mbéithe.	962	That it was time for you to think of marrying.
Cosaint cá bhfághaidh tu in aghaidh na cúise?	963	Who will speak for you against the indictment?
Focal níor thuill tu a leadhb gan lúithchlis.	964	You don’t merit one word, you indolent serpent
Ca bhfuil do shaothar saor le suidhmhchan?	965	Where is the proof of your amorous labours?
Ca bhfuil na béithe buidheach det ghníomhartha?	966	Where are the women who appreciate your favours?
Breathainse a bhaill seo a mhaighdean mhaordha,—	967	Let’s examine him carefully, O Royal Lady,
Ainimh ní bhfaghaimse mheill ar bhéithe é;	968	We won’t find on him a disabling malady
Breathain go cruinn a ghnaoi ’s a ghéaga	969	Give him a once-over, thorough and complete
Ó bhaitheas a chinn go boinnn a chaolchos.	970	From the top of his head to the soles of his feet.
Bíodh gurab ainimheach anmhíchúmtha é	971	Grant you he’s no maiden’s prayer
Chímse ceangailte a bharra gan diúltadh	972	But all the essential bits are there.
A ghile ní ghrádhfainn, b’fhearr liom buidhe é,	973	He’s too pale for me; I’d prefer him brown,
Is cuma na gcnámh—ní cháinfinn choidhche	974	About the cut of his physique—well, I don’t frown
Duine mbeadh dronn ’n-a dhrom is fánadh—	975	On people who have a hump on their back—
Is minic sin togha fir cromshlinneánach;	976	It’s often the one with a bod out of whack
Ba mhinic sin gambach lannsa gníomhach	977	Who is most proficient at wielding the lance
Is ioscada cam ag strompa bhríoghmhar.	978	And bandy legs don't tell what’s in the pants.
Is fáithibh foilightheach uireasbhach éigin	979	Is there a secret nefarious plan
D’fhág an doirbhtheach foirbhthe in aonta,	980	That keeps unmarried this aging man
Is méid a cheana idir mhaithibh na tíre,—	981	Given how he’s liked by the lords of the barony
A réim le sealad i gcaradus daoine,	982	And how he lives with other classes in harmony,
Seinnm ar cheólta spórt is aoibhneas	983	His single state lets him sport and play
Imirt ’s ól ar bhórd an saoithe,	984	Lets him eat and drink and romp all day
I gcomhair na fuirinne fuineadh as féile,	985	In the quality’s company to dawdle and tarry
An snamhaire ar b’fhuiris dom urraim-se géilleadh.	986	This shirker who could easily marry
Is taidhbhseach taitneamhach tairbheach tréitheach	987	Merryman seems a name for a merry man
Meidhreach meanmnach a ainm ’s is aerach.	988	But, in your case, I must say it just doesn’t scan
Ainmhidhe ’et shórt níor orduigh an Tiarna,—	989	A creature like you is not in God’s design
Geanmnaidhe fós i gcomhgar liaithe!	990	A gray-haired virgin is not at all divine
Creathaim go bonn le fonn do dhaortha,	991	I’m dying to get you in my grip
Is gairid an chabhair do labhartha baotha,	992	Your quick lip won’t let you give me the slip
Is coir módh is díreach suidhte it éadan—	993	Your crime is stamped in the lines on your forehead—
Deich fó thrí gan coimhreach céile.	994	That you are age thirty and still not wed.
Éistigh lium-sa a chlú na bhfoidhnneach,	995	Listen to me, O fellow sufferers
Faghaimse congnadh i gcúis na maighdne;	996	This guy is one among those who torture us
An crádh ’s an dúladh mhúch gan bhrígh me,	997	The sorrow that has burdened me down,
A mhná na múirne, is rún liom íoc air.	998	Girls, I want to take it out on this clown.
Congnaidh deirim libh, beiridh air, tóg é,	999	Help me, I ask you, grab the dope;
A Úna goirim thu ’s fagh dham córda;	1,000	Úna, hurry, fetch me a rope
Ca bhfuil tu, a Áine, ná bí ar iarraidh!	1,001	Anne, where are you, don’t get lost
Ceangailse, a Mháire, a lámha ar dtaobh thiar de!	1,002	Mary, tie his hands to the post
A Mhuirinn, a Mheadhbh, a Shadhbh ’s a Shíle,	1,003	Muireann, Meave, Shiela and Saive
Cuiridh i bhfeidhm le doighearthaibh díograis	1,004	Feel free, go ahead, and skin him alive
Barr gach scóla d’orduigh an tsídhbhean,	1,005	As the fairy lady authorized last night,
Báithidh sa bhfeóil gach córda snaidhmeach,	1,006	Knot the rope good and tight
Tomhais go fial na pianta is cruaidhe	1,007	Be generous with the pain that you deal out
Le tóin ’s le tiarpa Bhriain, gan truagh ar bith;	1,008	To the ass of Brian, the heartless lout;
Tóg na lámha is arduigh an sciúirse,	1,009	Raise your hands high and lay on the whip
’S sómpla sámh é a mhná na múirne!	1,010	Use elbow grease to give it some zip
Gearraigidhe doimhin, níor thuill sé fábhar!	1,011	He deserves no less, cut him deep with each blow
Bainidh an leadhb ó rinn go sáil de!	1,012	Flay him evenly from head to toe
Cloistear a chling i gcríochaibh Éibhir	1,013	Let the crack of the whip be heard throughout Ireland
’S critheadh a gcroidhe ’sna críontaigh aonta.	1,014	Put the fear of God in the unmarried band.
Is ciallmhar ceart an t-acht é, saoilim,	1,015	This new legislation is such a blast
Bliadhain an aicht seo is ceart a scríobhadh dhúinn:—	1,016	We have to record the year it was passed:—
Réidhtigh, ceil, nó goid de sceimhle	1,017	Figure: one thousand less one hundred and ten
Céad is deich fé leith as míle,	1,018	Leaves eight hundred and ninety which when
Dúbail ceart an freastal fuidhlaigh,	1,019	Doubled gives the year Seventeen Eighty
Is thúirling Mac an tseachtmhain roimhe-sin.	1,020	From which we’ll date Year One of our history.
Glacann sí a peann ’s mo cheann-sa suaidhte	1,021	As she grabbed a pen my head did hang
Ar eagla m’fheannta is scannradh an bhuailte;	1,022	In terror of more torture from that gang;
An feadh do bhí sí ag scríobhadh an dáta	1,023	While she was writing down the date
Is maithibh an tighe aici suidhte ar gárdain,	1,024	Which the court members round her could corroborate
Do scaras lem néill, do réidheas mo shúile,	1,025	I woke from my sleep, my pit of despair
’S do phreabas de léim ón bpéin ’om dhúiseacht!	1,026	And realized with relief—it was just a nightmare.
An Deireadh		The End

This task of editing and translating was completed on February 27, 1998. I bid farewell to the work and wish it well on its journey around the wide world.

---

Fill ar ais ar Chlár Chinn na Cúirte

Return to the Midnight Court Main Page